Beware the Joy Stealers

Joy Stealers

As you think about rezooming your legal career beware of the joy-stealers. Who and what is a joy- stealer? They are the people who, when you speak about your dream or positive events that have unfolded in your favor on this journey to rezoom, pour cold water on your moment. As you reflect on the law you would like to practice they tell you its too competitive or worse, “Well, no one would want to practice in that field so it should be wide open.”

Joy-stealers can be everywhere in the world of rezooming. Think about it. You begin to take confident steps toward your desire and someone, usually a friend or relative, reminds you about your commitment. These joy-stealing individuals can include your kids, aging parents, spouse or even yourself. As you rezoom your legal career joy stealers will be your most momentum-stopping influence.

The joy-stealers come along and tell you things like, “the only reason you got an interview was because you were older,” “they were meeting diversity quotas” or worse, “you knew someone in the practice.” All of these joy-stealing statements deflate your commitment to rezoom. Rezooming is about you. If you are ready to commit to your own joy, other’s opinions will follow. You need to believe in yourself and your abilities first. Otherwise, these joy-stealers will gain a foothold in your indecision and wreak havoc on your journey.

Joy-stealing comments may be true. Yes, your kids and aging parents will miss you and they do need you. The difference is, you will be better at fulfilling their needs and making them more self sufficient if you step away and have them problem solve on their own. You are not leaving them forever. You are still available to them, yet not at a moment’s notice and for kids, especially; this might be a good thing.

The best way to handle the joy-stealers is to thank them for sharing their perception or observation. Assure them you understand their concern. You believe you have made the right decision for you and others. The joy that comes from resuming your legal career with the mindset that it’s the thing you want to do is key. If you allow the joy stealers to chip away at your confidence it may be more difficult to rezoom your legal career.

Remember these three things when faced with the joy-stealers:

  1. Say thank you. This will quickly quiet them. You didn’t respond defensively and so caught them off guard.
  2. Know they mean well. In fact they may want to take the leap you are taking but do not have the commitment.
  3. Finally, recognize you are in control of how you respond to joy-stealers. This may be the most important piece of rezooming.

When the joy-stealers arrive in your rezooming adventure how you respond is key. It fuels your journey. Reflect back what they’re saying to you. If you remain positive and grateful for their observations they cannot steal your joy. Now get out there and rezoom.

All opinions, advice, and experiences of guest bloggers/columnists are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions, practices or experiences of Solo Practice University®.

This entry was posted in Guest Bloggers and tagged Debra Vey Voda Hamilton. Bookmark the permalink.

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